RECAP: CLAW Tuesday Night Fights 03/06/2012

Posted: March 20, 2012 in Fight Night Results

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OPENING

Tonight’s episode is broadcast from the Barrie Molson Centre in Barrie, Ontario. The show opens with a recap video package from last week, highlighted by the apparent theft of Ron “The Antiquarian” Donaldson’s collection of vintage sweater vests. Clips are also shown of “The Biker” Rod Stevenson bragging about putting Garbage Picker in the hospital, and of the tag team match where Heuvos Rancheros once again out-smarted his opponents in the Lightweight Division.

Cut to the ringside annouce desk, where Mike Kravinchik, Bernardo Verezzi and Paula Brown run down tonight’s card. They especially hype up that CLAW Heavyweight Champion Garbage Picker is supposed to be here tonight to confront the man who injured him, Rod Stevenson. Bernardo calls Picker an idiot if he shows his face here again after what happened last time.

PROMO #1

Ron Donaldson steps out of a cab in front of the arena dressed in a Georgian College sweatshirt. He’s so angry he nearly forgets to pay his fare, but then quickly apologizes and hands over a wad of cash. He storms off before turning back and then asks politely for a receipt. He runs into Pierre Boheme having a smoke outside the stage door. Donaldson roughs up the Frenchman and demands if he stole his sweater vests. Pierre screams “Non! Non! Sacre bleu!” so Donaldson apologizes and helps him back to his feet. He asks if Pierre knows who did steal his vests, and Boheme shakes his head.

PROMO #2

Keith Lethal is backstage, counting a stack of money. KD Bacchus walks by and asks where he got all that cash. Lethal claims he made it at the track. Bacchus says since Lethal is a betting man, would he like to put a wager on their match tonight to make it more interesting? Lethal perks up. Bacchus says he’ll put five grand on the line if Lethal will do the same. Lethal smiles and they shake hands on the deal.

MATCH #1
Keith Lethal vs KD Bacchus
$10,000 challenge

Referee Johnny Green holds up the briefcase containing the wagers before the match. The two men start off cautiously, exchanging lock-ups without either man getting an advantage. Lethal takes advantage with a couple of quick armdrags, but then Bacchus comes out of nowhere with a dropkick. Lethal back up and Bacchus hits a Russian legsweep for a two count. Lethal whipped into the corner, Bacchus follows but Lethal tags him with a spinning heel kick, then slingshots Bacchus into the turnbuckle. Lethal hits a knee drop for a two count. Lethal tries to wear down his opponent with a rear chinlock, but Bacchus fights out and nails a big kick to the head. Bacchus goes up top and goes for a flying headscissors, but Lethal reverses into a powerbomb for a nearfall. Bacchus rolls out of the ring for a breather. Lethal comes out after him and Bacchus trips him, dropping Lethal hard across the ring apron. Bacchus hits an Asai moonsault to the floor, before rolling Lethal back in for another two-count. Bacchus sets up for the Kiss of the Bacchae when suddenly Pistol Pete runs down to ringside. He makes a move as if he’s going to jump in the ring and Bacchus lets Lethal go. Pete backs off and Bacchus turns around right into the diving shoulder tackle. Lethal slaps on the Lethal Injection and Bacchus is forced to tap out.
WINNER: Keith Lethal by submission
Post-match, Lethal celebrates with his briefcase full of money in the ring.

PROMO #3

Heuvos Rancheros is being serenaded by his mariachi band backstage. He starts to describe how he’s going to squash the Jason The Spider Salva like, well, a spider, when Ron Donaldson bursts in, grabs a guitar from one of the band members, and smashes it on the floor. Donaldson suddenly looks embarassed and apologizes profusely, then asks if Rancheros has seen his vests. Rancheros says not to worry, he understands feeling a special kinship for your wardrobe. The Mexican suggests Donaldson check the security footage to see who broke into his locker room. Donaldson thanks him and leaves, and Rancheros curses at him under his breath in Spanish. He then goes back to his promo, explaining that Salva has a big job ahead of him tonight in his match against Rod Stevenson. Rancheros says he wants the Spider to get to CAPITAL CITY CARNAGE in one piece, so he offers to second Salva in the match tonight in order to watch his back.

PROMO #4

Garbage Picker shows up backstage in a wheelchair and neckbrace. As the camera rushes in to get comments from the champ, Picker winds up and smashes the camera with a crutch. Though the screen goes black, the audio can still be heard, and Garbage Picker mumbles something about “I would clean that up, but I’m in a friggin’ wheelchair.”

MATCH #2
GDT vs Ella Sinder (w/Cindy the Psycho Cheerleader)

GDT starts off fast with high-flying offence, hitting a dropkick and a flying cross-body into a nearfall. She hits a dragsonscrew legdrag into a leglock submission, but Ella thumbs her in the eye. Taking control, Ella slows down the match with a backbreaker and an abdominal stretch. She’s using her technical prowess to keep GDT grounded. She hits the vicious knee to the kindeys and then a neckbreaker for a near fall. GDT hits a surprise headscissors takeover out of nowhere, but she’s clutching her back. GDT climbs the turnbuckle for a top-rope move but Ella grabs the referee, claiming she’s hurt. With the ref distracted, Cindy jumps on the apron and pushes GDT off the top rope. Ella sets GDT up on her shoulders for a big move, but out of nowhere Queen Fat-Ema runs down and clobbers her with a clothesline. Johnny Green calls for the bell to throw out the match. Ema picks up GDT and crushes her with a powerslam, then plants Ella with a brainbuster. Cindy looks like she might get in the ring to help out, but Ema goes after her, too, so instead she runs away.
WINNER: Ella Sinder by disqualification

PROMO #5

Fog horns sound on a clear open sea. Camera pans down to a rugged man smoking a pipe, standing on a wharf wearing rubber boots. He says he’s survived storms and fished the biggest monsters of the sea, but the biggest prize he’s never caught is the CLAW Heavyweight Championship. He says he has eyes set on that trophy like Ahab had his eyes set on the Moby Dick, and he’ll sail all seven of the seas if he has to in order to win it. Thar she blows, it’s Captain Aloysius White!

PROMO #6

Ron Donaldson is on the phone backstage. He’s trying very hard to be polite but he’s oviously upset. He keeps asking “What do you mean you don’t have the tapes? What kind of security office loses the security tapes?” SUPA RINGUBUSHI! walk in, and Takeda is waving around a video cassette in his hand. Takeda says they stole the tape from the arena in Windsor, and they know who stole the vests. They say they have unfinished business with Donaldson after HOGTOWN HOSTILITY, and they just want to make his life miserable. Donaldson asks politely for the tape. Takeda calls him an idiot and says this is a wrestling show – if Donaldson wants it, he’s going to have to beat Saito in a one-on-one match next week for it.

MAIN EVENT
“The Biker” Rod Stevenson vs. Jason “The Spider” Salva

Salva’s title is not on the line obviously, as Stevenson is over the 200-pound limit for the Lightweight Championship. Both men make their usual entrances, but before the match can start Heuvos Rancheros comes down to the ring to stand in Salva’s corner. Salva tells him to piss off, but Rancheros gets all insulted and takes a seat at ringside anyway. Stevenson uses his strength to control the early match-up, tossing Salva around the ring effortlessly. He hits headbutts and a huge bodyslam, but when he goes for the cover he puts his foot on the ropes for leverage. Rancheros jumps up and points out the cheating to the referee. Stevenson drops Salva with a throat strike and nails a fist drop, then starts choking the Spider. Rancheros once again gets up and warns the ref, this time because the Biker is pushing his five-count. Stevenson goes to yell at Rancheros, and Salva nails him with a dropkick from behind that sends him over the top rope and out to the floor. Salva runs across the ring and hits a springboard dive that takes out both Stevenson and Rancheros. Salva presses the advantage by hitting a monkey flip on the floor. Salva rolls Stevenson back into the ring, and Rancheros comes up to offer the Spider a chair to use against his opponent. Salva pushes him aside and climbs into the ring. Salva goes to whip Stevenson into the ropes and Rancheros winds up to hit the Biker with the chair, but Stevenson reverses and whips Salva instead, and Rancheros blasts the Spider with a chairshot to the back. Rancheros looks guilty and shocked as Jason Salva stumbles into the waiting arms of Rod Stevenson, who nails the piledriver and covers for the 1-2-3.
Winner: Rod Stevenson by pinfall after a piledriver

Post-Match: Heuvos Rancheros high-tails it out of the ring and heads to the back. Stevenson rolls and kicks Salva out of the ring. Garbage Picker rolls down the aisle to the ring in his wheelchair. With great difficulty, he gets up on crutches and hops up into the ring. Stevenson is laughing his ass off through the whole thing. Picker hobbles up to Stevenson and stairs him down, and which point the Biker breaks down into laughter again. Garbage Picker hauls off and smashes the crutch over Stevenson’s head. The crowd goes nuts as Picker pulls off his neckbrace and cast and opens a can of whoop ass all over Stevenson. Stevenson eventually bails out of the ring and Picker grabs a microphone. The champ says that if Stevenson still wants his title shot, he can have it at Capital City Carnage, but only if they make NO-DQ, NO COUNT-OUTS, and FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE! Stevenson smiles and nods as the show goes off the air.

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